Dating Sites

How do you even meet men? When I was a kid it was easy. You push the boys on the playground, they chase you, you write a little note and voila! Boyfriend! Then you grow up. Let's say you're in highschool. You think a guy is cute. You giggle, flirt, and get set up by your friends. Voila! Boyfriend! Or disasterous tearful bathroom bashing session. Could go either way at that point. Or it could be both! What fun! But let's say you don't keep that highschool sweetheart, for whatever reason. You grow up more. Become an adult. Start working. Start having resposibilities. Start to become a hermit because you realize people just piss you off.
Then you wake up one day. Horny and alone. And you want to cuddle and have a friend. Someone that you can fight with harmlessly. Someone who gets your stupid jokes. Someone who's stupid jokes YOU get. How the hell do you find this person in this day and age of technology and seclusion? All your friends are either married or living with thier boyfriends. They caught the RelationShip, but I apparently forgot my floaties and was left crying on the dock with a box of cookies and self pity. The answer: dating sites.
I am a member of a couple. And first of all, let's face it, you get what you pay for. Me being poor I have to go with free. And in my searching I learned VERY quickly that free doesn't mean FREE. Most so-called free sites are free if you only create a profile. You can be seen. But you can't see anyone else. Contact anyone else. Or respond if someone contacts you. Not unless you want to pay 19.95 a month for the priveledge of responding to some guys single word "Hi" email.
And while I am on that what is with "Hi"? Yes. It's a common salutation. A conversation starter. Key word conversation. Cause the truth is the quickest way into a woman's pants is thru her brain! News flash! We like to talk! We WANT to know you! It's crazy, I know. Who would have thought that porn lies and women don't just randomly have sex with the pizza boy in lieu of a tip? I'm sure this is expecting A LOT but I really want a man to attempt to talk to me. I'm not that hard to talk to. Really. Try it sometime.
Back to dating sites! Let's say you get on a site that allows you to contact and respond to people. Fantastic! Where are the people?... Oh! There they are! YOU have to approach THEM! And what's this? No picture of your face at a reasonable distance? But a close up of your abs.... Fantastic. Now don't get me wrong, I like a well toned body as much as the next woman. But "Butterface" goes two ways. And if you have an attractive face, odds are you know it, and are on these sites to get some tail. Again. That's fine. But be honest about it. Women like to make informed decisions. Honestly if you are up front and say "I only want sex" I might even show up. Cause sometimes that all I want to use you for.
But let's say all goes well in the initial email phase. You joke around tentatively. Feel each other out (not up, that hopefully comes later).  It seems promising. Numbers are exchanged. And those good tentative conversations you had all of a sudden disappear thru text message. Example: I was talking to "Bob". We traded emails for a month. All went very well. Jokes were traded. Small connection made. Numbers traded. Now all I get is a texted "Hey" at 2am when he is drunk. Fantastic. Just what I wanted. Fuck you "Bob".
To sum up cause my train is derailing: I'm on a dating site. This is the only way I can meet men, cause none of my friends know any single men. And this is going to be the fodder for my disasterous dates. Woot!